Thursday, April 14, 2011

Yes I am am alive, but it was a very difficult winter in Toledo, Ohio this year. I was caught up in the slow, cold realities of the season, and some other things I had no control over. Winter can have its beauty, and its special solitudes, but it can really close your life down and emphasize the negative issues happening all around you. While my overall health remained good as I did my dialysis, ran five to six days a week, and maintained my overall schedule with my wife and family, I was overwhelmed by the depression and sadness that accompanies the time of year. I also dealt with the deterioration and death of my 14 year old Lab who, towards the last months, demanded all but just a few of my minutes everyday. Every night for about the last year or so my wife and I would be forced to take "shifts" sleeping in the downstairs with her, because not only could she no longer walk up and down stairs, she also would bark all night long if left alone for even a few minutes. We loved her very much and losing her was very difficult. Death was part of the dialysis unit as I was aware of at least a few deaths this winter from various complications from individuals situations.

The funk lasted until just recently when my wife an I took a small vacation to Dallas where i have family. Being in that environment was so good in so many ways. The family love, the warm and green weather, and the feeling of renewal that comes with getting away from home just turned things from our winter blahs to a spring of hope.

My wife has hounded me to stay on top of the blog for several reasons, not least of which is the good it does for me to have this to do every few days and to share with others needing to know they are not alone with their struggles to move ahead while dealing with a life and death health issue in their life. I look forward to future interactions. Please feel free to share your comments, and your experiences with me. Thanks...and a very good Spring to you.

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