Funny thing happened yesterday. I had a call from the Cleveland Clinic saying they had a matching Kidney for me, but. Turned out that I did not get the Kidney but the three hours of suspense were a Satori in my regular routine. In the seven plus years I have been on the waiting list, I have got exactly none of those "we have a Kidney for you" calls. So while exciting it also forced me to take a breath and take it all in as best I could. When I found out I was not to get the Kidney, I was disappointed, but not sad. Just shaken by how it could really ( and will) change in a few moments someday.

It is really not a question of a better quality of life or the relief of suffering, I truly do not feel that is at stake here. Rather a new journey and challenge. Like anything new it is exciting, and little frightening at the same time. I've learned that expectations do not in any way make the reality of what is any thing but what it should be. In other words, expect nothing, and all will be open to you.